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First Week of Advent Reflection: Hope
Advent always begins with hope.
But if we're honest, it's not always easy to actually hold onto hope.
Hope is often easiest to grasp when life is going well.
When blessings feel abundant.
When prayers seem answered.
When peace flows freely and joy comes naturally.
In those moments, it’s effortless to “taste and see that the Lord is good.”
But it’s an entirely different story when we’re suffering.
And all of us have suffered in our lives.
Some of us are suffering right now.
What do we do with hope in those seasons?
Today, I want to offer a reflection that blends what psychology teaches us about hope, what our faith reveals about it, and a personal story from my own life that reminded me (very painfully) what hope really means.
When Hope Feels Far Away
It’s often in our hardest seasons that hope feels like it slips through our fingers.
Pain can make the future feel cloudy.
Suffering can make progress feel impossible.
And discouragement can make our thoughts whisper, “Things will never change.”
Not long after my newest baby was born, I found myself in one of those seasons.
What began as the typical nursing challenges spiraled into mastitis, then a severe allergic reaction to the antibiotics, then a full flare of rheumatoid arthritis after enjoying remission during pregnancy.
My body felt like it was betraying me. Every movement hurt. Every feeding hurt. Every day felt heavier than the one before.
And I was sad. Deeply sad.
This wasn’t how I wanted our days with a newborn to begin. I wanted to soak in and enjoy every moment since it goes by so quickly!
And I certainly hadn't imagined returning to levels of pain that I hadn’t felt in years.
For a moment, it all felt hopeless.
But even in that darkness, something shifted one day when I sat in prayer with the Lord.
He helped remind me that it wasn't supposed to be this way.
God didn't design us to experience all of the pains of this life.
And realizing that allowed me to shift my perspective just enough to truly help me move forward with each day, without adding to my own suffering.
Pain does something unexpected: It reminds us that this difficult, broken world is not our home.
We were made for Heaven, for wholeness, and for God.
And in that truth, something inside me found a flicker of hope again and choose to focus on the things that are within my control.
The Psychology of Hope: A Framework for Moving Forward
Psychologist Charles Snyder describes hope through three components:*
1. Goals – Meaningful, personally valuable things we are striving toward.
2. Pathways – The possible routes we can take to reach those goals… and our ability to adapt when challenges arise.
3. Agency – The belief that we have the strength and motivation to keep going, even when the journey is long.
This framework shows us that hope isn’t passive or wishful thinking or pretending everything is fine and invalidating ourselves.
Hope is active and resilient. Hope is choosing to believe there is a way forward, even when the path feels painful. And finding purpose in the path.
That kind of hope can be built, strengthened, and practiced.
It gives us something to focus on that's within our control, even in our suffering.
But faith adds something even more powerful than this psychological perspective alone.
The Theology of Hope: A Deeper Anchor for the Heart
The Catechism says:
“Hope is the theological virtue by which we desire the kingdom of heaven and eternal life as our happiness,
placing our trust in Christ’s promises and relying not on our own strength, but on the help of the grace of the Holy Spirit.”
(CCC 1817)
Psychology teaches us that hope gives direction, perseverance, and courage.
Faith teaches us that hope gives eternity.
Hope from a faith perspective tells us:
This world is not the end.
Pain is not the end.
Suffering is not meaningless.
And we never carry it alone.
Think about it this way:
When you love someone deeply—your child, your spouse, your friend—your instinct is often to rescue them from their pain.
God must feel that for us infinitely more.
Yet He allows suffering for the same reason we sometimes allow our loved ones to endure what is difficult:
Rescuing them immediately may ease the pain in the moment... but it can also prevent the healing.
Just like a physical wound must hurt to heal, our spiritual and emotional wounds often require tenderness, patience, and allowing the process to unfold.
God is not distant in our suffering, Reader.
He is the one who sits with us, holds us, strengthens us, and offers hope into the very places we feel most broken - if we invite Him into it.
He knows what it's like to suffer. But Jesus also knew the truth that His suffering was not the end.
Hope doesn’t remove the suffering.
But it does transform it - if we allow it to do so.
Let This Season of Suffering Prepare Your Heart
Whatever you are carrying this first week of Advent (grief, stress, worry, exhaustion, frustration, loneliness, etc.)...
I'm gently reminding you today that God can make it fertile soil for hope.
Because hope doesn’t deny the pain.
Hope faces it, feels it, brings it to the Lord, and chooses to trust Him anyway.
This is the essence of Advent.
Waiting with expectation, trust, and hope in Jesus' arrival.
Advent Hope Reflection Prompts:
As you move through this first week of Advent, I invite you to sit with these questions in prayer.
- Where in my life am I struggling to feel hopeful right now?
- What “goal” is God inviting me to hold onto, even if the path seems hard?
- Where might He be showing me new pathways forward, especially unexpected ones?
- How is He strengthening my agency? What small step can I take in faith this week?
- How can my present sufferings gently turn my heart toward the hope of Heaven?
- What does it look like to trust God’s promise of eternal life even in the midst of earthly pain?
Take your time with these. Journal some thoughts about them. Pray with them. Let the Lord meet you in them.
And let your hope be rooted in Him and inspire you toward growth and healing this season.
*Hope framework from Charles Snyder, referenced in Robyne Hanley-Dafoe’s Everyday Resilience column on Psychology Today.
Wishing you a hopeful start to Advent! 💜
Blessings,
Samantha Stefaniak, LMHC
Founder & Coach
Rooted Soul, Grounded Mind
